What would you say if I asked you this weird question? Probably most people would say, “No, I’m not”,“Attractive? Not at all!”,“I wish I could say yes.”or something like that. Actually these were the answers I’ve got.
Especially if you are a girl, I think it’s more likely you don’t believe yourself as an attractive. Because in general, girls do more care about their looks than guys do.
In fact, in any country, girls are more conscious about fashion, makeup or any activity related to appearance.
In worst case, some girls give up dating anyone because they think their looks are just not good enough. How sad is that. This is the reason behind I made the below video.
■ One Message From a Girl
Just a few days ago, I got one message from a girl. I instantly recognized her, because she’s one of the very few people who have been watching my channel and giving me her comments often from very beginning. I feel like she’s one of my best friends even though we haven’t met before.
She got interested in a Japanese guy in college. The feeling is getting bigger day by day, and now she can’t stop thinking about him all the time. It's no doubt she’s in love. I was so glad to hear that.
But, she already kinda gave up the love because she thinks she’s too fat. She thinks her size is too embarrassing for Japanese guys. She said, “Looking at the mirror, I realized my body is too horrible. I’m the only pig in my college..”
Sounds super ridiculous, right?
But, this is actually not just her. A lot of girls in Japan think the same way as she.
Japanese people have the reputation of being slim or skinny. Compared to US, for example, you rarely see overweight person on the street. I think that’s because Japanese people (especially women) are very conscious to be skinny. Also, the food, culture, life style, transportation, a lot of things in Japan help us to be slim.
I think skinny Japanese people make people be passive and unconfident to date someone. If everyone around you is fat, you don't care about your size even if you’re overweight. People’s eyes don’t bother you so much.
But the opposite situation makes you definitely conscious. I heard some people even give up coming to Japan because they don’t wanna feel embarrassed about their sizes in Japan, which makes them realize more they’re overweight.
■LOOKS DO NOT MATTER!
I can’t emphasize this enough.
I guess most guys in the world prefer slim girls to overweight ones.
But, that’s just in the beginning. As time goes, you don't care about looks at all.
Physical attraction is just temporary. No matter how super good looking she is, the attraction disappear soon just like the joy of cigarettes, beer, porn,etc. It doesn’t last long.
When I was in college, A very beautiful glasses girl got me at a class. Her style was exactly like supermodel. To me, she was beyond gorgeous girl.
I luckily got a chance to talk with her alone at a cafe. I was super excited and my heart was beating so fast.
But in the end, her attractiveness disappeared soon. Because she was acting like princess, like complaining about her friends and teachers a lot behind back, being rude to waiters. Honestly, her attitude was disgusting. After watching how she behaved, she was no attraction to me anymore.
Good looking girls attract guys a lot, of course. Actress, model, Celebrities on the TV and magazine are really really appealing. But when it comes to in a relationship or friendship, good looking is definitely not necessary to keep the relationship going.
■Everyone is Attractive!
Even if you think you’re not good looking like supermodel, it does NOT mean you’re not attractive.
I really believe everyone has each different own attractiveness. You can't compete yourself with other people like, “Which person is the best? Who wins?". That’s just meaningless.
Take a look at the 2 Japanese guys below.
The left guy is definitely handsome. I’m sure any girl in the world is attracted.
On the other hand, how about the right guy?
Let’s be honest. You can’t say he’s good looking, right? Although The definition of good-looking is different for everyone, I’m sure 99% people think he’s not handsome.
If he participated in a model contest, everyone would think he's just a janitor or something.
I used to believe I'm not attractive at all. But, a few people actually said he’s attractive! I can’t believe it!!
Sure, maybe most people were just polite, but I don’t think everyone was lying.
Even if a nerd looking Japanese guy like me is attractive, why not you are?
The videos above clearly proved anyone has own attractiveness no matter how look you are. Attractiveness is totally different depending on the person. You can’t say, “Only good looking people are called attractive!”. Each person has each attractiveness.
■Stop Overthinking About How You Look!
Girls tend to overthink about their looks more than guys. Beautiful actress, celebrities, and many cute Japanese girls give more influence to the tendency.
Self-consiousness about own body is sometimes good thing, but to me, it seems so many girls are too obsessed.
But, deep inside, do you really think looks are really so important?
Think about your friends, family or anyone you like in your life.
Do you think you like the people because they are good looking and handsome?
I’m sure no one never says that. Nobody chooses friends or partner based on their looks.
What I really want to tell you is, why don’t you see yourself as you see your best friends and family? Your best friends and family are attractive, not because the looks, right?
Let me tell you this as a guy.
I do not care about looks of women so much. I do much more care about how you talk, how you behave, how you treat other people.
Also, I’m always attracted to confident girl. When I see a girl talking so lively with a lots of energy, I’d like to hang out with the girl no matte how look she is.
I strongly believe confidence is more important to attract a guy rather than good looking.
Hi! My name is Nobita, a native Japanese guy.I'm a Web Designer in Japan. I have a YouTube channel, "Find Your Love in Japan" to show "real" Japanese people for you.