Japan's 4 seasons of suffering

Some like it hot! I am not one of them. When I came to Japan, I had heard that the climate was quite similar to the UK in that it was a seasonal country. In fact, talk to pretty much any Japanese person about it and they will very proudly tell you how Japan has four seasons. (A classmate has told me that it is a commonly taught topic in English lessons, making it a universal conversation that every Japanese person knows). However, my experience of seasons in England left me entirely unprepared for the torture that is Japanese weather!

In the UK, the seasons tend to roll on by fairly calmly. Beginning in a cold and windy winter, it moves through a modest spring, into a hot and dry summer for about a week before dipping back down into a cool and breezy autumn. Rain comes all year round but is more common in winter, and the degree of just how cold or warm your experience will be is related to just how far north you live.

Every season is pretty much tailored to be just enough to complain about in conversation, but never enough to put you through actual discomfort as long as you have a home to return to. The heat is bearable if you can get into shade, with houses not even needing air conditioning, while the winter is just cold enough that you feel relieved coming into a well heated house, fitted with double glazed windows and extra blankets to throw on top of you if the radiators aren't quite strong enough.

Japan's four seasons are a hellscape of pain and suffering compared to this. Winter is bitter cold with temperatures ranging from around the same as in the UK in Tokyo, to temperatures that would make the Siberian tundra feel warm up in Hokkaido. On top of this though, the air has been sucked dry of any humidity that would usually be around, causing your lips to crack and break apart if you even think of stepping out without chap stick.

The change into spring is announced with the start of an unofficial 5th season; hay fever season. In Japan a large percentage of the population suffers from particularly bad hay fever, causing the trains and streets to become a cacophonous roar of sneezing, coughing and all manner of bodily fluids flying through the air.

Once this has hit its peak, spring has truly begun and it is probably the most beautiful season you will find anywhere in the world. The weather is warm but not too warm, gentle breezes blow through the air and everything feels wonderful. It is made even nicer with the cherry blossom that blooms during this time, although this wondrous time is made slightly less magical thanks to the excessive number of people rushing to drink heavily underneath a cherry tree. Don't expect this to last too long though, since summer is about to start and once again Japan is going to get brutal.

The summer starts with a rainy season, the sixth unofficial season that Japan has, which is basically as it says; wet. The heat is starting to get pretty bad at this point, but luckily the rain is keeping things just about manageable on that front. That is the only good thing about the rain though, since it seems to fall from the sky with a force unmatched by any shower or hose you'll find in Japan. Clothes are soaked through in minutes and umbrellas just serve to make sure you are being hit with water from the dozen or so people around you rather than just from above.

When the rain finally breaks you'll wish it hadn't; temperatures are sky high at this point, with humidity that ensures you are drenched the second you leave the house. If you have working air con you'll never want to step outside, but if you don't then you'll be rushing out of your greenhouse of a home as quickly as possible. I often find that during this time I am unable to dry off after a shower due to sweating quicker than I can towel off!

You might think the next season to talk about is autumn, but Japan with its very solid four seasons has yet another surprise up its sleeve; the seventh unofficial season is typhoon season! In case you were getting bored with the lethal heat that causes salarymen to collapse at the side of the road, the end of summer brings a number of typhoons along to keep you on your toes. These will lock you inside your house (or any building you find yourself in) while you wait them out. If you are foolish enough to go outside during one, then you'll be facing razor sharp winds blowing water at you horizontally fast enough to take you off your feet. Umbrellas are more of a liability in this weather as they can take you on a Mary Poppin's ride you won't be coming back from. Usually the worst of it is over after a few hours, with each typhoon lasting maybe a day or so, but there can be dozens of these over a few months so you won't be getting much rest!

Finally, the last and only other bearable season arrives in Japan, autumn. This is vaguely reminiscent of spring, but with less cherry blossom. The weather is a little bit wetter, with some left over typhoons occasionally blowing through, but in general this is as good as it gets for weather in Japan. It also tends to last slightly longer than the spring does, with the added bonus that there isn't any hay fever so much less sniffing from suffers behind their face masks. In case you couldn't guess, this is my favourite season and is also rather beautiful to go hiking in from my experience.

Honestly, the weather in Japan is probably not as bad as I make it out to be; as an Englishman I take pride in being able to complain about any weather no matter how good or bad it is! However, the extensive range of temperature and humidity found in the country, along with just how different it can be from the north to the south, makes Japanese weather a nightmare to try and survive with. generally though, the good periods of weather will more than make up for the bad ones, and everyone will find at least some period of time in which the climate is perfect for you. Even if it's just for a day.